Discipline mistake #3: Mom and Dad don’t agree

Jim and Sally are a great couple. They love God, love God’s people, and serve unselfishly. We have known them for over thirty years, they have been married over forty. They had three kids, now all grown and married. They were agreed on their church and their place in it, but not agreed on how to raise kids.

As a matter of fact, they were a walking, talking manual of how not to raise kids in unity. Often there was a conflict about when, how, or whether or not to discipline. Sally was doing her best to submit, but not very joyfully, and not very privately. Jim was always ridiculing Sally’s suggestions and using sarcasm to get a laugh or a snicker from his boys.

The seeds of contempt were sown and the later teen years became quite heart-breaking for Jim and Sally.

When Jim was around, he carried the day; but when he was at work and Sally had the kids, she did things her way. By not backing Jim up, Sally was undermining her own authority with her kids. By not honoring Sally in front of the kids, Jim was sowing seeds of dishonor that would later grow a bitter harvest.

Today, Jim and Sally are still plugging along together. Their kids are grown and raising their own families, Jim and Sally’s grandkids. Struggles are apparent. They are not part of a church, their kids are not obedient, more heartache seems certain.

For Mom and Dad to be on the same page is hard work. It takes a commitment from both. Each parent has a big contribution to make toward unity. Each will have to sacrifice to make it happen. It will be worth it.

The Father wants us to be one because he is seeking children who will display His nature.

Malachi 2:15  “Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit . . .”

Matthew 6:24  “No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.” Although Jesus said this about God and money, its truth certainly applies in our homes. Our kids can’t have two masters.